d.r.a.m.a.

You know what is worse than being dramatic?

Having people cause drama for you.

Everybody knows somebody like this. I am just so unlucky, in fact, to know MANY people like this.

You know exactly who I am talking about: the guy (or girl) who says they hate drama, but actually love causing it...

just so they can sit back and say, "hey, look how dramatic he is," or "wow! I am soooooo glad I'm not like that."

This frustrates me. Greatly.

I have recently found myself thrust into a very dramatic situation, one that I apparently caused. Now, normally when I cause something, I know about it. In this case, however, I didn't know about it until my front door was greeted by two helpless eggs, that upon contact with my beautiful burnt sienna door proceeded to explode and make my front step smell fucking terrible.

Afterward, I figured it was just probably the football players that my roommate had not allowed into our party since our once proud franchise is now pitiful. (As a side note, he literally told them they couldn't come in since they lost so badly, it was hilarious).

BUT ALAS! It was NOT the football players.

Who it was doesn't matter--they still don't even know that I know--but the point is it was all caused by this phantom person (pretty sure I know who it is) who claims I made a statement I did not make. Seriously, I didn't say what was claimed. Now, however, I must painstakingly go through the process of righting a situation that I never wronged, and absolving myself of something I did not do, all of which is exceedingly frustrating.

I hope you all know that I am not trying to be hypocritical here, I know that I have been dramatic in the past, caused drama myself, and will probably do so in the future. Nor do I plan on using this blog as an outlet to release events in my personal life. I'm just saying it sucks much worse when someone else causes drama for you based on faulty grounds. Sucks a whole lot.

So, beware the friend who says they hate drama! They most likely say that because they love watching others wilt away in it!

Happy Tuesday!

Here is something that I have always struggled with:

how to act when you actually like someone.

Throughout my four years at JMU it has been increasingly and increasingly easier to find people who I am both attracted to and compatible with. HOWEVER, it seems as though these people are never the right ones.

This leads me to believe that, for people like myself, there is always a person out there that you have your "eye" on but are never able to talk, interact, or be with...which, I have found, is ALWAYS the case in my life.

So, my question to both the reader and myself is, how do you fix this apparent problem? Do you act like the sketchy guy at a party or bar who just goes for it? Do you play it cool and act like the person isn't there and that you don't really care about who they are with and what they are doing? Do you tell them exactly how you feel? Do you sit at home after the fact and ask yourself all these questions in your head?

As simple as the answer may seem...it is never that simple. It is different for each person because the fact of the matter is, when you are truly attracted to some person, everything goes out of the window. There is no more "game"or "sweet talking" but rather awkwardness and contemplation as to how, when, or if you are going to communicate with that other person.

This fact sucks...because it's true.

I feel that for most people, when you value something to such a high level, you begin to question every action that you take. Every move, word, sentence, and even inflection that you make is scrutinized inside your own head to the point where you feel like you can't do or say anything that is right, which inhibits you from being...you.

I've found that blogging about personal struggles seems to make them seem less real. Therefore, expect more personalized blog entries to come.

Until then, my advice (which I am unable to heed myself) is to talk to that certain person that always intimidates you, or is "too cool", "too hot", "too popular", or "you don't know enough." You never know what might happen.

Let me know the verdict, seeing as though I can't do any of those things myself.

My first blog post

Here it is.

I finally did it:

Blogging.

I have long wondered when, if, or even should I do this whole "blog" business. Today, sitting down on my couch and watching Real Chance of Love 2: Back in the Saddle, I decided there certainly must be some better way of using a bit of my spare time. Thus, we have "Our Endless Numbered Days," a title blatantly copied from one of--if not my favorite--albums of all time.

I didn't just steal the name because I thought it was cool, or that I would sound really "artistic" (what does that even mean anymore?) if people read the title, but because I think its applicable...and appropriate...and...

artistic.

So begins my cycle of endless numbered days of blogging. I do this without any knowledge of how long or consistently I will post, but seeing as though I am one of the all-time worst communicators with family and friends who I am separated from, this gives me an outlet to correspond with them and give them insight on exactly how much they are not missing out on in regards to my life.

I'm also doing this because I want to re-awaken my ability and love for writing. I virtually don't write anymore, and that is somewhat depressing.

Phew! I thought doing a blog post was going to be a lot harder than it actually was. I think the best part about it is that I'm not going to be graded for my incorrect grammar, and if people think I'm an asshole, they just don't read it. And by the same token, if you find it interesting, you keep up with reading it...that's a cool concept.

So I leave you with this parting gift: If you don't listen to Patty Griffin already, do yourself a favor and check out her album Living with Ghosts. It is one of very few albums where every single song is amazing.

Ciao!